Meaningful Numbers
by Justin Bourque

Thought: "Numbers don't mean anything to me man, it's all about just having fun." 95% of the boulderers that I have met while climbing use this reactionary comment to dispel the notion that the difficulty of a line is their motivation for bouldering. I call bullshit. The numbers, as well as aesthetics and movement of boulder problems motivate most climbers. Most boulderers embrace some form of a competition within their climbing. Denying this aspect of your bouldering is denying part of who you are as a climber.

Journal Entry: 3 weeks in Hueco
I left for Hueco this winter on December 22nd, skipping Christmas with the hope that my disregard for the holiday would allow me some quiet bouldering in Hueco before the masses stormed Rob's Rock Ranch for the New Years celebration. On the long flight to El Paso my mind began to focus on future sends that may or may not happen during my stay. I knew, being primarily a gym rat, that the straightforward, powerful bouldering in Hueco would suit me and so I placed some pressure on myself to accomplish what I knew I could: you know, like sending Fred Nicole's project out from under his...Anyway I won't go into details about my long-standing rivalries with some of the best (I'm sure they all talk about me incessantly). My point is that my motivation lies in pushing my abilities to their limit, and sending as hard as I can. I was not psyched to send harder than the guy next to me. Especially in Hueco where the guy next to you probably warms up on your projects. But I intended to push myself as hard as I could.

Before long, my friend Russ and I had met a group of motivated and positive boulderers from all over the world. We didn't know them prior to the trip, but it didn't matter. It was as if there was some sort of unspoken understanding between us all. Each one of us was bizarre enough, socially confused enough, to be sitting around a small fire in the middle of a desert drinking what may or may not have passed for beer on Christmas Eve. Though getting too drunk and forgetting to call your parents on Christmas was NOT part of the plan, it does represent where a climber's priorities lie in relation to those in 'normal' society.

In the days to follow I discovered that the beauty of a bouldering area and the positive energy surrounding you while climbing with genuinely nice and motivated climbers can alter your climbing significantly. I still wanted to send hard but the stillness and intensity of Hueco kept me feeling humble about what I was trying to do. The place simply does not allow climbing on pebbles all day to be more important than an unbelievable sunset that grows larger in the sky while the pebbles shrink into the distance behind you. *This writing is becoming annoyingly flowery and somewhat cheesy(both of which I hate) yet I am writing what for me is the truth, so I guess I'll have to ask you to put up with it.

In spite of this overwhelming calmness, I began to send the lines that were challenging to me. It was as if the bouldering gods were pleased with our group's positive effort and were rewarding us all with success. Either that or they felt I had suffered as a gumby of a climber long enough that they might throw me a bone to keep me from whining.

To me this is what bouldering is all about. Though I greatly respect and envy those individuals who are highly self-motivated, and can boulder hard on their own, I am forced to feed off those around me to climb at my limit. However, I'd rather boulder by myself than with those who are negatively competitive or simply indifferent. The dynamic of the group of boulderers I am with is everything. My strength or skill as a climber are second to this type of energy. I am only as good as my friends around me want me to be. Luckily, in Hueco, all those around me were selfless and encouraging, and it made this trip the best one I have ever been on.

I am not poetic. My mind and my heart have always been classical in nature. When I walk up to a problem or an area I see beauty more in the movement of the problems rather than how they look. Whatever small amount of romanticism that resides in me, however, was brought straight to the forefront by my experience in Hueco. I was surprised when I came across a Hueco local who climbed purely for the joy of moving on rock. Not a single ounce of competitiveness or motivation to send hard in him. Only after climbing in Hueco could I possibly understand how this climber accomplished such a feat. Hueco almost made me feel that difficulty and numbers are insignificant.

I sent four v10's and a v11 while I was there. Those were my hardest sends. I am proud of them and am proud of myself for focusing and pushing myself to send them. This is not an elaborate ploy to spray, I haven't dared to ask Joe to put my name in that news section again for years now and likely never will again. Remember though when you are shouting at each other about who is a bigger spraylord, that competition and numbers are not inherently bad or evil. Besides, the 'Numbers mean nothing man!' line is painfully transparent. If you were wondering where I got the 95% from in the start of this ramble I made it up ok! Jesus, don't be so concerned with numbers.

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